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	<title>Best Pinay Mom</title>
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	<description>Musings of a Pinay Working Mom</description>
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		<title>Single Parent Challenges &#8211; How To Face Various Problems</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/single-parent-challenges-how-to-face-various-problems/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/single-parent-challenges-how-to-face-various-problems/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 Jul 2010 19:05:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[act that way]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[single parent families]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[single parent family]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[single parent home]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[single parents]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/single-parent-challenges-how-to-face-various-problems/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Being a single parent involves many difficult challenges. It&#8217;s even harder than it looks. Single parents deal with challenges all day, every day. Many of those challenges arise from being not only single but a parent. There are children to care for and take care of. And because you are ...]]></description>
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<p>Being a single parent involves many difficult challenges. It&#8217;s even harder than it looks. Single parents deal with challenges all day, every day. Many of those challenges arise from being not only single but a parent. There are children to care for and take care of. And because you are the only parent, everything you do carries greater weight. </p>
<p>No matter what you do, as a single parent, you must think of its effect on your children. You must be diligent in keeping up with their activities and their thoughts as they grow up in a single-parent home. In fact, the biggest challenge of being a single parent is the effect of your status on your children. </p>
<p>The transition to a single-parent family is difficult for kids. They may feel abandoned or insecure. They may feel isolated and different from other kids, even if there are more single-parent families than ever before. </p>
<p>Your children may resent you for the loss of your spouse, or they may have unresolved issues with the missing parent. As a single parent, it&#8217;s your job to keep them talking about what&#8217;s going on with them and what they think. Even though they may resist, you need to get them to talk to you about their worries, their fears, and their anger. </p>
<p>And you need to let them know they&#8217;re all right. They&#8217;re normal kids despite their circumstances. They aren&#8217;t responsible for the change, and they don&#8217;t have to make up for it. You should give them as normal a childhood as possible and be a role model. Even when they don&#8217;t act that way, they look to you as their example of what a grown-up is and does. </p>
<p>Your kids need to know you&#8217;re there for them, no matter what. You have a busy schedule trying to earn a living and manage the household. But you must never be too busy for your children. Even when you are in financial trouble, the job can&#8217;t take priority over the kids. They need to know how important they are to you. They need to know you love them more than anything else. </p>
<p>You&#8217;re going to have to build a new relationship with your children. As a single parent, you&#8217;re the only source of affection and guidance in the home. Even if you weren&#8217;t close before, you&#8217;re going to have to get close now. One good way to do that is to do lots of fun family activities. </p>
<p>Another way that will help the whole family is to assign specific chores to your children that will help keep the household running efficiently. Giving them responsibility will help them feel that they belong and that they are important. It will also give them a sense of accomplishment necessary to build a healthy self-image.</p>
<p>Single parents need to admit that they need help and then get help. You can&#8217;t do everything by yourself. Trying to may ruin your health, your attitude, and your relationships with your children. Getting to know your neighbors is a great way to find people who can help you look after the kids when you must be away. Neighbors can also help with household repairs and yard work. </p>
<p>Your neighbors may also be adult companions and role models for your children, but you must be careful. Get to know your neighbors well before you allow your children to be alone with them. Remember that the world is a more dangerous place than it was when you were a child. There&#8217;s no substitute for good parental judgment. </p>
<p>Time is the enemy when you&#8217;re a single parent. You probably have to work, and that means being outside the home a lot. Unless you have help, it also means your children may spend a lot of time at home alone. You&#8217;ll need to take extra precautions and lay out specific rules for time you&#8217;re not there. </p>
<p>Children who are alone a lot are vulnerable to drugs and criminal behavior. Gang activities are sky-rocketing. You&#8217;ll have to find a way to monitor your kids while you&#8217;re not home. This difficult challenge must be met head-on or your children may pay for it with their very lives. </p>
<p>You may have a challenge with your children&#8217;s attitudes about you as well. They may blame you for their situation or think you&#8217;re not doing things right. They may not show you the respect you want and expect. And they may feel cheated if you can&#8217;t attend special events like birthdays, PTA meetings, parent-teacher conferences, recitals, and other events that parents usually attend. These time pressures are especially difficult for single parents.</p>
<p>If you can&#8217;t make the time to make at least some of these events, it&#8217;s time to have a talk with the boss. Maybe you can work out a special work schedule or do some of your work at home. If you can&#8217;t find a solution with your current job, you may need to look for other more flexible working arrangements. If both are impossible, it&#8217;s important that your children know and understand why you can&#8217;t be with them. Be honest. They&#8217;ll understand the truth better than no explanation at all. </p>
<p>It&#8217;s important to remember that you can&#8217;t just give time to your kids. It must be quality time that helps them grow and mature. They need to know that you love them and that you need them. Never give them the idea that they&#8217;re a burden to you. Tell them often how much you love them. Listen to them. Ask them questions and listen to their answers. Show your interest in them as individuals. Even when time is limited, you can make the time you spend with them special and positive. It&#8217;s worth the trouble. And your reward is the love and respect of well-behaved, responsible children.</p>
<p>Even when life deals you and your children a bad hand, you can make life together enjoyable and productive. You can build healthy relationships with your kids and watch them become happy, productive young adults. </p>
<p>Despite the many hard challenges of being a single parent, you must always maintain your perspective and honor the most important priorities. It won&#8217;t always be hard or unpleasant. You&#8217;ll have many happy times and lots of love and laughter in your single-parent family as long as you keep a healthy positive attitude and keep on working toward a better life for you and your children.</p>
<p>          <span>Abhishek is a family counselor and he has got some great <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.Better-Parent.com/126/index.htm">Single Parenting Secrets</a> up his sleeves! Download his FREE 65 Pages Ebook, &#8220;Single Parenting &#8211; Becoming The Best Parent For Your Child!&#8221; from his website <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.Better-Parent.com/126/index.htm">http://www.Better-Parent.com/126/index.htm</a>. Only limited Free Copies available. <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/parenting-articles/single-parent-challenges-how-to-face-various-problems-740361.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


Tags:  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/act-that-way/' >act that way</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/single-parent-home/' >single parent home</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/single-parents/' >single parents</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/single-parent-family/' >single parent family</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/single-parent-families/' >single parent families</A>  <BR/>

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		<title>Theory On Single Parenting &#8211; Not All The Single Parents Come Under The Scanner</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/theory-on-single-parenting-not-all-the-single-parents-come-under-the-scanner/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/theory-on-single-parenting-not-all-the-single-parents-come-under-the-scanner/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 Jul 2010 03:32:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[argumentative issues]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hypotheses]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hypothesis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[moral support]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[speculations]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[
Speculations on mono parents differ according each individual. A few explain it under the concept based on exposure and feeling. A few others brief it on the concept of logics.
Hypothesis on mono parents might cause agitation as it disturbs the ethics of an individual following Christianity. However, if we get ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p>Speculations on mono parents differ according each individual. A few explain it under the concept based on exposure and feeling. A few others brief it on the concept of logics.</p>
<p>Hypothesis on mono parents might cause agitation as it disturbs the ethics of an individual following Christianity. However, if we get to lend our ears to these speculations, a notion about mono parents will be fed to us, so as so spread it.</p>
<p>Certain speculations like the mono parents beating up their kid if he or she is wronged or frustrated are argumentative. A few support this hypothesis, while a few disagree with it.</p>
<p>People, who disagree with the hypothesis, insist that they ought to be penalized so as to put a full stop to such cruel actions. While, others who support it, argue that penalizing parents will frighten the kid and make him or her orphaned.</p>
<p>Speculations on mono parents differ as per the faith, practice and legacy of a society. Without knowledge, individuals puts forth hypothesis in accordance with their exposure in that subject, and it is eventually followed. </p>
<p>Raising a child needs no hypothetic views. They just require love, care and affection and support from the elders. </p>
<p>Hypotheses may be proved wrong. So it is suggested that such speculations should not let to be influenced in our living. The acceptable and good views can be followed. These hypotheses bring out a moral, which should be considered.</p>
<p>Various speculations on mono parents originated, so as to help them raise the kid in a better way.</p>
<p>Hypotheses on preaching mono parents to enhance the kid&#8217;s belief on the almighty, also exists, as it can provide us with a moral support and mental courage against the obstacles of life.</p>
<p>The speculations on mono parents mostly remain as argumentative issues. Mono parents, as matured individuals, ought to know what to follow and what not to follow from the various hypotheses put forth on them.</p>
<p>Hypothesis on mono parenthood exists since centuries ago. But still, it remains a hot subject till date.</p>
<p>Hypothesis on mono parenthood vary according to how they are singled, be it separation or widowhood or adoption or the spouse being imprisoned. As an illustration, a divorcee, should acquire, from the speculations, on how to overcome societal criticisms  </p>
<p>These speculations present, help mono parents realize the variation of their role as a parent as compared to normal parents and also the right time to see another companion and have an affair. </p>
<p>Kids for parents, who have got divorced, generally tend to act mutinous, mainly when they enter their adulthood. The hypotheses put forth will help mono parents control the attitude and mannerisms of such children.</p>
<p>Mutinous kids are a personification of the touch me not plant. They are more possessive and seek for individual attention and are very stubborn in acquiring things. It is the duty of the mono parents to look through their emotions and activities and support them.</p>
<p>To err is human. Mono parents might have made errors on major issues. But they should leave aside their past and know their stand. They should learn from their past and be a living example to their kids. It is natural for kids to get inspired by the individuals they live with.</p>
<p>Mono parents must be cautious about how they approach the speculations and hoe they preach morals from it, to their kids. They must understand the kids&#8217; needs and provide with more than enough love, care and affection.</p>
<p>          <span>Abhishek is a family counselor and he has got some great <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.Better-Parent.com/126/index.htm">Single Parenting Secrets</a> up his sleeves! Download his FREE 65 Pages Ebook, &#8220;Single Parenting &#8211; Becoming The Best Parent For Your Child!&#8221; from his website <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.Better-Parent.com/126/index.htm">http://www.Better-Parent.com/126/index.htm</a>. Only limited Free Copies available. <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/parenting-articles/theory-on-single-parenting-not-all-the-single-parents-come-under-the-scanner-740382.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


Tags:  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/speculations/' >speculations</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/moral-support/' >moral support</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/hypothesis/' >hypothesis</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/hypotheses/' >hypotheses</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/argumentative-issues/' >argumentative issues</A>  <BR/>

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		<title>Parenting From Prison</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/parenting-from-prison/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/parenting-from-prison/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 Jul 2010 12:18:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[children of incarcerated parents]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[criminal justice policy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loss of a parent]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mothers in prison]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sentencing project]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[
Most people can understand how prison can destroy one&#8217;s life. One mistake can put an end to one&#8217;s dreams and alter their remaining years forever. However, very little emphasis is placed on what effect prison has on the children of incarcerated parents.
The Sentencing Project, a national non-profit agency dedicated to ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p>Most people can understand how prison can destroy one&#8217;s life. One mistake can put an end to one&#8217;s dreams and alter their remaining years forever. However, very little emphasis is placed on what effect prison has on the children of incarcerated parents.</p>
<p>The Sentencing Project, a national non-profit agency dedicated to research an advocacy on criminal justice policy issues, recently released a study that emphasizes the destruction of stability for children of incarcerated parents and what can be done to help their upbringing after a loss of a parent to the justice system.</p>
<p>The Sentencing Project reports that often these children rarely visit their parent(s) while incarcerated and many jailed parents report never receiving a visit at all from their children. The report also shows that these children are much more likely to drop out of school, and engage in destructive behavior themselves, which sometimes leads to their own incarceration.</p>
<p>According to the report, &#8220;In 2007 there were 1.7 million children in America with a parent in prison, more than 70 % of whom were children of color &#8230; Many children, especially in cases of women&#8217;s incarceration, were in single-parent homes and are then cared for by a grandparent or other relative, if not in foster care.&#8221;</p>
<p>The rise in the number of children of incarcerated parents can be attributed to the rising number of mothers in prison. The number of mothers in prison has increased by 112% from 29,500 in 1991 to 65,600 in 2007. Furthermore, in 2007 one in 15 African American children had a parent in prison, compared to one in 42 Hispanic children and one in 111 White children.</p>
<p>Another factor the can affect a child who has a parent in prison is the marital status of their parents. Stereotypically, a child from a two parent home can better cope with having a parent incarcerated than someone who has to begin a new life with a different guardian in a different home. According to the report, &#8220;More than half of all incarcerated parents have never been married, and increase of 19% since 1997, and only 17% of incarcerated parents were married at the time of their imprisonment, a decrease of 28% since 1997 &#8230; Although most incarcerated parents have never been married, many have lived with their children prior to arrest. Among parents in federal prisons in 2004, [approximately] half (48%) had lived with their children in the month prior to their arrest.&#8221;</p>
<p>Even after their release, children of incarcerated parents have to cope with reestablishing the bond with a parent that they have grown up without for some period of time. This is often made more difficult because of economic and geographic factors.</p>
<p>However, the Sentencing Project has offered many suggestions in their report that they believe will aid in this transition. The non-profit organization believes the Adoption and Safe Families ACT (ASFA), signed by President Bill Clinton in 1997 should be repealed. This bill authorized the termination of parental rights for any parent with a child living under foster care for 15 of the last 22 months. The average prison sentence exceeds 22 months.</p>
<p>Additionally, The Sentencing Project believes correction institutions should support parent/child relationships. According to the report, &#8220;The Bedford Hills, NY, women&#8217;s prison, for example, has long maintained a program by which newborn babies can live with their mothers in prison for a time.&#8221; Furthermore, the organizations believes that laws prohibiting former inmates from receiving food stamps has no useful purpose and adversely affects the children of incarcerated parents.</p>
<p>Therefore, the Sentencing Project believes that even if a parent made a mistake the ruined their future, the future of their children should not be ruined in the process.</p>
<p>          <span>Todd A. Smith is the web master for <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.regalmag.com">; Regal Mag </a> The preeminent Online Magazine for African American Men. For more information on this subject visit our <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.regalmag.com/community-t-34.html">; Community Section</a> To read about <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.regalmag.com/what-happens-children-incarcerated-parents-a-326.html">; children of incarcerated parents</a> <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/parenting-articles/parenting-from-prison-807007.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


Tags:  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/mothers-in-prison/' >mothers in prison</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/sentencing-project/' >sentencing project</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/criminal-justice-policy/' >criminal justice policy</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/loss-of-a-parent/' >loss of a parent</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/children-of-incarcerated-parents/' >children of incarcerated parents</A>  <BR/>

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		<title>What Is And What Is Not Proper Parenting</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/what-is-and-what-is-not-proper-parenting/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/what-is-and-what-is-not-proper-parenting/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Jul 2010 14:49:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[age of adulthood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[aunty]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[proper parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[punishments]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[whipping]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[
AN ARTICLE ON
WHAT IS AND WHAT IS NOT PROPER PARENTING
 
When you have a baby, the baby is indeed helpless you as the parent/parents need to do everything for that child, until he/she can start doing things on his/her own, walking, talking etc.
What some parents ought to know is that parenting ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p><strong>AN ARTICLE ON</strong></p>
<p><strong>WHAT IS AND WHAT IS NOT PROPER PARENTING</strong></p>
<p><strong> </strong></p>
<p>When you have a baby, the baby is indeed helpless you as the parent/parents need to do everything for that child, until he/she can start doing things on his/her own, walking, talking etc.</p>
<p>What some parents ought to know is that parenting is not just having a child and just knowing you are the mother or father and nothing doing what a real parent should be doing. In other words some parent thinks that letting the child/children have their own way without properly monitoring them they are going to gain that child. This kind of thinking is absolutely absurd and can lead into major difficulties for you and that child as he/she grows older.</p>
<p>Always remember that you are the parent and if the both parents are around that there should only be one man/woman in that house until that child reaches the full age of adulthood. Children are very smart I would say that as soon as a child is born their senses are well in tack as long as, it&#8217;s a normal child. In some cases it takes a longer time to develop in some people.</p>
<p>From the time a child get enough sense as small as they are when they do wrong we need to correct them. If it&#8217;s a baby or a toddler you deal with them according to their ages. You won&#8217;t slap a baby as if it&#8217;s a seven year old, but whatever measure you take to put that child in order let your message be sent across.</p>
<p>Never beat a child without letting them know what they are getting the whipping for. I must mention that there are other techniques other than using the rod. Punishments seems to work a lot, e.g. take away something they cherish very much, ground them or try talking  and see if it would resolve the situation .</p>
<p>As small as that child may be his/her brain already sends a message to let them know daddy/granny/aunty don&#8217;t correct me when I do such and such. If when that chid is around the mother knowing that when he does something out of the way, mummy would be very quick to correct, he/she would seldom do it around her.</p>
<p>Each parent little motto should be: <strong>Spare not the rod and spoil the child</strong></p>
<p>When children are spoiled you breed what I&#8217;d call 100% brats. Some people thinks that it works that everything a child asks for you give them. You have to let your children know that everything in this world don&#8217;t come easily. If on the other hand you do vice versa that very same child that you think will love you very much for the manner in which you deal with him/her. It would back fire on you someday believe it or not, you would be embarrassed when you take them to town/city and you don&#8217;t have money to purchase that extra toy, etc. </p>
<p>I have seen it over and over where children literally starts to scream and bawl throw themselves on the ground yelling and kicking up, &#8220;I want that toy&#8221;. Parents stand amazed in awe! Not knowing what to do to bring this child back to his/her composure.</p>
<p>As parents you all love your children and would do almost anything to keep them out of harms way; you sometimes would rather die in that child&#8217;s place. Although love compromises sometimes you ought to know your limit, and that is you are in charge. Don&#8217;t let that child rule you especially when they abide under your roof. Let them know their places and that you all weren&#8217;t delivered around the same time in the hospital, or changed diapers together. Children respond to what they see and hear, if you gave them their own way always that&#8217;s what they&#8217;ll want forever. If perhaps someday you don&#8217;t give them their own way, some will say all sought of demeaning things to you, might even kill you. So stop it right now get a back bone put away the wish bone be men and women in your homes.</p>
<p>If an egg is rotten and you still cook it, it will still be rotten when it&#8217;s finish cooking. Just the same with a child rotten once, then rotten for life. They may live to be 90 years and still want everyone to give them their way all the time. </p>
<p>Parents you ought to learn that LOVE is not being goody good all the time. You have to correct your children when they do wrong, spank them when they need it, there is a time for everything. Remember that chastening drives foolishness far away.</p>
<p>Most of you modern day parents I am almost 85% positive you weren&#8217;t brought up that way .Oh how we need those all fashion days. When you speak to your child and he or she speaks back to you rudely, don&#8217;t just sit there and let them go on. Turn back that curtain of memory and see what your parent would have done to you if  you had answered back, whatever you see and it did help you to stop being rude, then try it on your child as long as it isn&#8217;t violence.</p>
<p>Today when we look around children curse their parents, beat them, kill and some are now raping what have this world come to? Then just ask yourself why? Who? What?  How? and When? Most of the time the parents are to be blamed. Grow up a child in the way you want it to be and they shall never depart from it. If you do wrong things in front your child/ children, they wouldn&#8217;t have respect for you. Therefore if you try to correct them you would get back words that can make your heart want to give up.</p>
<p> Some children get to hate you when they grow older and say to themselves if mummy and daddy had corrected me when I did wrong. I wouldn&#8217;t be in this situation today, all what you did to gain your child&#8217;s love when down the river.</p>
<p>As I am on this topic I must mention that the not beating children law United States of America have is totally intolerant. That&#8217;s why they do what they want, go and come when they feel like it, get involved in drugs, prostitution, lesbianism, homosexuality etc. A child needs someone to show them the right part and when a parent could hardly speak to their own child, before the child hit the parent or starts shouting at them and running to call the cops for everything. </p>
<p>When you hear or see these things going wrong etc.  Don&#8217;t let it tingle your toes and ears. Change those foolish laws and things may fall into its right perspective. </p>
<p>Children need to feel appreciate and loved by their parents and loved one. Always make time for your family, carry them out, and teach them to pray and learn manners, how to be grateful for what they have, show them how to do things, how to behave themselves at home and out. </p>
<p>Mothers you are your child/children  role model I only mean in the right way. When the father is away from home, you have to take up his role sometimes. Never let your children pressure you to the point where you say &#8220;you see you I can&#8217;t handle you&#8221;. When you do that they would take advantage of you.</p>
<p> Let them know that when your friends come over that it&#8217;s not their friends and they need to get lost. Not sticking around and poking their mouths and heads into big people business. </p>
<p>Also mothers if it&#8217;s possible where you can survive being a house wife. Try you best; I know it maybe hard depending on the society we live in where everybody wants to be independent. Think about it this way that giving up one thing for another and that is a well grounded child. That would always love and appreciate you.</p>
<p>For all your patience, love kindness and nurturing you gave to them. When they most needed it, and if ever a child needs you is from day one and especially when they reaches adolescence. Telling them about how to try and be prepared for the life ahead. Let your girls know about their monthlies etc. Where they are confused and don&#8217;t understand the changes they are going through. The taught that runs through their mind e.g. thinking about boys/girls whereas they never had time for that before.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s the time they need someone to reach out to them to let them know you went through it and they can make it to. Teach them about life and what it entails. They may want to ask you questions that you never expected they would.</p>
<p>If you don&#8217;t know or feels embarrass about it find a nice way in telling them. Don&#8217;t leave it up to them to find out, they could go asking the wrong person and there are lots of Sharks just waiting to devour their prey. Before you know it you child is gone.</p>
<p>Know who are your children&#8217;s friends, check out the places they go and what they do. Just don&#8217;t sit back and believe everything they tell you, e.g. they going to the mall and when you know wake up you realise that he/she has been going to the wrong places.</p>
<p>Another thing is that parents also need to know there limit. You have to learn that when children get older you can&#8217;t speak to them as if they are still small, e.g. If you have a 30 year old married son and you still want to send him on errands etc in a demanding approach. They may do it but look at you as taking away their manhood/womanhood and belittling them. A next e.g. is remembered as they get older they would start wanting to be independent; you have to give some slack.</p>
<p> Trust them, that don&#8217;t mean you&#8217;d just stop being a parent. Never believe everything your child says, if you get a complain investigate. We were all born liars, so don&#8217;t put it far from them, don&#8217;t let the little angelic face fool you. Children do the most outrageous things behind their parents back. Then hide behind your sympathy and affection for them.</p>
<p>If you want respect show some to them, can&#8217;t treat them any how and expect them to respond to you nicely. Think about when you were there age how you were and then your thinking and understanding would change if it hasn&#8217;t, you should always try to be your children&#8217;s best friend.</p>
<p>Also when you are wrong acknowledge it and humble yourself, don&#8217;t feel that you are too big. We are all human beings so we&#8217;ll   make mistakes.</p>
<p>So parents grab a hold of yourselves and stop drifting, and we would have better children in this world. If you are not doing any of the right things I said above. Then you are not fit to be a parent.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><strong>Done by: Abigail Chandler</strong></p>
<p><strong>Date: March 19th, 20</strong><strong>09  </strong></p>
<p><strong>From: Trinidad, West Indies</strong></p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>          <span>D.O.B. : January 4th ,1988 Horoscope: Capricorn Age: 21 Place of birth: Port of Spain Current Nationality: Trinidadian Sibblings: Three sisters Hobbies: Reading interested articles, stories about nature, life, fiction, non fiction. I love writing stories and articles, hope to publish a book some day. I also like using computers, and the internet it helps me learn new things, Sewing and playing organ/piano or anything musical. I love music also, singing and instrumental, almost all the musical instruments is appealing to me. The bagpipe is one of the sweetest music you can ever hear. Favorite Authors: king James, RH Disney, Enid Blyton, Danielle Steel, Ossie Davis,Dr. Julian Melgosa, etc. <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/parenting-articles/what-is-and-what-is-not-proper-parenting-824521.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


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		<title>The Changing Dynamics of the Parent and Teen Relationship</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/the-changing-dynamics-of-the-parent-and-teen-relationship/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/the-changing-dynamics-of-the-parent-and-teen-relationship/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Jul 2010 01:00:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[adolescent years]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parent child relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teenage child]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ups and downs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[violent response]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[
The parent-child relationship is at its most challenging when your child inhabits that wildly unpredictable phase that is often termed as &#8216;adolescence&#8217; or &#8216;the teenage years&#8217;. Parents and teens go through a lot of ups and downs and encountering frustrated teenagers and equally frustrated parents is not an uncommon sight. ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p>The parent-child relationship is at its most challenging when your child inhabits that wildly unpredictable phase that is often termed as &#8216;adolescence&#8217; or &#8216;the teenage years&#8217;. Parents and teens go through a lot of ups and downs and encountering frustrated teenagers and equally frustrated parents is not an uncommon sight. Many parents feel as if they are dealing with complete strangers when interacting with their teens and they are at a loss as to the best way of connecting meaningfully with their teenage child. This becomes all the more difficult when parents are routinely subjected to the slamming of doors on their faces, disrespectful and cheeky back-talk and a judgmental attitude on the part of their kids.</p>
<p>If you are a parent who identifies with these parent and teen situations, the best way to react is to be objective and look within yourself first. In the first place, is some particular trait in you triggering a violent response from your child? Do you truly empathize with the problems of your child? Do you even know what problems your child encounters on a daily basis or are you relatively alienated from the life that your child leads? If you are ignorant of your child&#8217;s daily activities, have you made any serious effort to rectify the situation or have you just shrugged it off and decided to think about it later?</p>
<p>When answering these questions, honesty is essential. By being truthful, you might find the solutions to these problems within yourself and won&#8217;t need to take any professional help to reach a state of understanding and mutual respect with your teenage child. Parents need to realize that during the adolescent years, the teenage child is grappling with the world her or she lives in. She is neither completely an adult nor is she a child and a perfect balance is very difficult to attain. This is an age when the child has to deal with so many different issues and that too, on her own. Some amount of anger and rebellion in the parent-teen equation is only natural and should not surprise or disappoint you as a parent. There are certain things that you can do, however, that will lessen the trauma and create a better rapport with your teen.</p>
<p>First on this list is being a good listener. How many times do we get angry when others do not listen to us? Why, then, do we become inattentive when our child is narrating something that is apparently important to him/her? Is it because we think that we can get away with it or is it because we consider their issues too trivial for serious consideration? What you as a parent need to realize about your children is that their life and their problems are very overwhelming to them. Adult or not, you need to accord them the dignity of being a rational human being and treat them in a respectful manner. There are lots of parents who have unimaginably busy schedules which make it difficult for them to talk to their teenage children daily and find out what is going on in their lives. For such parents, delegating quality talk-time on weekends to their children will go a long way in establishing a great parent and teen sensibility.</p>
<p>The next thing that you need to remember is not to be emotionally affected when your teen hurls a scathing comment at you. If you react in a similar manner and become abusive, you will lose the trust of your child forever. This does not mean that you become a punching bag and take whatever comes your way. You just need to be firm and cool when your child is being particularly insulting and state that such behavior will not be tolerated in your vocabulary of the parent-teen relationship. As for your personal feelings, you need to understand that what makes your children so audacious is their certainty of your support, no matter what they say.</p>
<p>There are a large majority of parents who do not make their kids feel secure. They are over-critical and judgmental about their children. This can lead to terrible consequences with the teenage child. Not only is there a serious possibility of your teenage child being rebellious and moody, he may start rejecting every idea that you put forth. Teenage children need large doses of encouragement and approval from their parents for their personal growth and you need to be aware of this when interacting with them.</p>
<p>You also need to introspect and analyze your ways of expressing your anger or frustration. Do you lose control and give vent to excessive language or gestures when you are angry or hurt? Perhaps your teenager has observed these traits in you and unconsciously internalized them. If this is the case, then it is time to acknowledge the fact and try to bring about a change in yourself before you try and correct your susceptible teenager. This can also be a wonderful method to establish great comfort levels in the parent and teen relationship.</p>
<p>However, you also need to understand that certain situations rightly provoke anger in your teenage child. Rather than indulging in the blame game at this juncture, you should talk to your child and discuss the other alternatives that could have helped to cope with the situation better. This kind of discussion will help your child probe the choices that were available to him or her and deal with similar situations in a more matured manner. It will also help to cement the parent-teen tie and cause your child to look upon you as a benign guide who is always ready to stand by him or her.</p>
<p>Another sensible move on your part would be to assign your teenager with responsibilities and give them more control over their lives. Having the power to take personal decisions is extremely valuable to the teenage child and most of them will use it wisely since they do not want their parents to be disappointed in them. Of course, if you have serious reason to mistrust your child, this is a step that you have to re-consider. In most cases, though, the teenage child will appreciate your treatment and trust and behave in a manner that will make you proud as a parent.</p>
<p>These are some small steps that can transform the relationship between parents and teens into something that is incredibly precious and beautiful. What you ultimately need to remember is that thoughtful parenting during the teenage years will go a long way in developing great adults who will always look upon parents as their friends.</p>
<p>          <span>Get Your Free Report On 16 Proven Ways To Motivate Your Child To Do Better In School&#8230;Plus, receive a &#8220;Live Demonstration Inside Our Unique 1 On 1 Online Classroom.&#8221; Go to <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.tutorfi.com/parents/" title="http://www.tutorfi.com/parents/">http://www.tutorfi.com/parents/</a> <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/parenting-articles/the-changing-dynamics-of-the-parent-and-teen-relationship-898570.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


Tags:  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/teenage-child/' >teenage child</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/violent-response/' >violent response</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/parent-child-relationship/' >parent child relationship</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/adolescent-years/' >adolescent years</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/ups-and-downs/' >ups and downs</A>  <BR/>

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		<title>Full Transcript of President Benigno Aquino III’s (PNoy) First State of the Nation Address (SONA)</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/president-benigno-aquino-iii%e2%80%99s-pnoy-first-state-of-the-nation-address-sona/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 26 Jul 2010 09:18:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pinaymom</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[joseph ejercito estrada]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[juan ponce enrile]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[PNoy SONA]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pres. Aquino first SONA]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[President Benigno Aquino III’s (PNoy’s) First State of the Nation Address (SONA) Full Transcript
Session Hall of the House of Representatives
July 26, 2010
Speaker Feliciano Belmonte; Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile; Vice President Jejomar Binay; Chief Justice Renato Corona; Former Presidents Fidel Valdez Ramos and Joseph Ejercito Estrada; members of the House ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: justify;">President Benigno Aquino III’s (PNoy’s) First State of the Nation Address (SONA) Full Transcript<br />
Session Hall of the House of Representatives<br />
July 26, 2010</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Speaker Feliciano Belmonte; Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile; Vice President Jejomar Binay; Chief Justice Renato Corona; Former Presidents Fidel Valdez Ramos and Joseph Ejercito Estrada; members of the House of Representatives and the Senate; distinguished members of the diplomatic corps; my fellow workers in government;<br />
Mga minamahal kong kababayan:</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Sa bawat sandali po ng pamamahala ay nahaharap tayo sa isang sangandaan.<br />
Sa isang banda po ay ang pagpili para sa ikabubuti ng taumbayan. Ang pagtanaw sa interes ng nakakarami; ang pagkapit sa prinsipyo; at ang pagiging tapat sa sinumpaan nating tungkulin bilang lingkod-bayan. Ito po ang tuwid na daan.<br />
Sa kabilang banda ay ang pag-una sa pansariling interes. Ang pagpapaalipin sa pulitikal na konsiderasyon, at pagsasakripisyo ng kapakanan ng taumbayan. Ito po ang baluktot na daan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">GOV’T HAS LONG STRAYED TO THE CROOKED PATH<br />
Matagal pong naligaw ang pamahalaan sa daang baluktot. Araw-araw po, lalong lumilinaw sa akin ang lawak ng problemang ating namana. Damang-dama ko ang bigat ng aking responsibilidad.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Sa unang tatlong linggo ng aming panunungkulan, marami po kaming natuklasan. Nais ko pong ipahayag sa inyo ang iilan lamang sa mga namana nating suliranin at ang ginagawa naming hakbang para lutasin ang mga ito.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">RP’S PROBLEMS WIDE-RANGING; TRUE STATE OF THE NATION KEPT SECRET FROM THE PUBLIC<br />
Sulyap lamang po ito; hindi pa ito ang lahat ng problemang haharapin natin. Inilihim at sadyang iniligaw ang sambayanan sa totoong kalagayan ng ating bansa.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">PROBLEMA SA BUDGET</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Sa unang anim na buwan ng taon, mas malaki ang ginastos ng gobyerno kaysa sa pumasok na kita. Lalong lumaki ang deficit natin, na umakyat na sa 196.7 billion pesos. Sa target na kuleksyon, kinapos tayo ng 23.8 billion pesos; ang tinataya namang gastos, nalagpasan natin ng 45.1 billion pesos.<br />
Ang budget po sa 2010 ay 1.54 trillion pesos.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Nasa isandaang bilyong piso o anim at kalahating porsyento na lang ng kabuuan ang malaya nating magagamit para sa nalalabing anim na buwan ng taong ito.<br />
Halos isang porsyento na lang po ng kabuuang budget ang natitira para sa bawat buwan.<br />
Saan naman po dinala ang pera?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">CALAMITY FUND<br />
Naglaan ng dalawang bilyong piso na Calamity Fund bilang paghahanda para sa mga kalamidad na hindi pa nangyayari. Napakaliit na nga po ng pondong ito, ngunit kapapasok pa lang natin sa panahon ng baha at bagyo, 1.4 billion pesos o sitenta porsyento na ang nagastos.<br />
Sa kabuuan ng 108 million pesos para sa lalawigan ng Pampanga, 105 million pesos nito ay napunta sa iisang distrito lamang.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">ONE DISTRICT IN PAMPANGA GOT P105M; PANGASINAN ONLY GOT P5M FOR 2008 CALAMITY<br />
Samantala, ang lalawigan ng Pangasinan na sinalanta ng Pepeng ay nakatanggap ng limang milyong piso lamang para sa pinsalang idinulot ng bagyong Cosme, na nangyari noong 2008 pa.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">FUNDS FOR PAMPANGA GIVEN ON ELECTION MONTH, 7 MOS. AFTER “ONDOY”, “PEPENG”<br />
Ibinigay po ang pondo ng Pampanga sa buwan ng eleksyon, pitong buwan pagkatapos ng Ondoy at Pepeng. Paano kung bumagyo bukas? Inubos na ang pondo nito para sa bagyong nangyari noong isang taon pa. Pagbabayaran ng kinabukasan ang kasakiman ng nakaraan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">MWSS<br />
Ganyan din po ang nangyari sa pondo ng MWSS. Kamakailan lamang, pumipila ang mga tao para lang makakuha ng tubig. Sa kabila nito, minabuti pa ng liderato ng MWSS na magbigay ng gantimpala sa sarili kahit hindi pa nababayaran ang pensyon ng mga retiradong empleyado.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Noong 2009, ang buong payroll ng MWSS ay 51.4 million pesos. Pero hindi lang naman po ito ang sahod nila; may mga additional allowances at benefits pa sila na aabot sa 160.1 million pesos. Sa madaling sabi, nakatanggap sila ng 211.5 million pesos noong nakaraang taon. Beinte-kuwatro porsyento lang nito ang normal na sahod, at sitenta’y sais porsyento ang dagdag.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ang karaniwang manggagawa hanggang 13th month pay plus cash gift lang ang nakukuha. Sa MWSS, aabot sa katumbas ng mahigit sa tatlumpung buwan ang sahod kasama na ang lahat ng mga bonuses at allowances na nakuha nila.<br />
Mas matindi po ang natuklasan natin sa pasahod ng kanilang Board of Trustees. Tingnan po natin ang mga allowances na tinatanggap nila:</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Umupo ka lang sa Board of Trustees at Board Committee meeting, katorse mil na. Aabot ng nobenta’y otso mil ito kada buwan. May grocery incentive pa sila na otsenta mil kada taon.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Hindi lang iyon: may mid-year bonus, productivity bonus, anniversary bonus, year-end bonus, at Financial Assistance. May Christmas bonus na, may Additional Christmas Package pa. Kada isa sa mga ito, nobenta’y otso mil. Sa suma total po, aabot ang lahat ng dalawa’t kalahating milyong piso kada taon sa bawat miyembro ng Board maliban sa pakotse, technical assistance, at pautang. Uulitin ko po. Lahat ng ito ay ibinibigay nila sa kanilang mga sarili habang hindi pa nababayaran ang mga pensyon ng kanilang mga retirees.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Pati po ang La Mesa Watershed ay hindi nila pinatawad. Para magkaroon ng tamang supply ng tubig, kailangang alagaan ang mga watershed. Sa watershed, puno ang kailangan. Pati po iyon na dapat puno ang nakatayo, tinayuan nila ng bahay para sa matataas na opisyal ng MWSS.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Hindi naman sila agad maaalis sa puwesto dahil kabilang sila sa mga Midnight Appointees ni dating Pangulong Arroyo. Iniimbestigahan na natin ang lahat nang ito. Kung mayroon pa silang kahit kaunting hiya na natitira – sana kusa na lang silang magbitiw sa puwesto.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">ROAD USERS’ FUND<br />
Pag-usapan naman po natin ang pondo para sa imprastruktura. Tumukoy ang DPWH ng dalawandaan apatnapu’t anim na priority safety projects na popondohan ng Motor Vehicle Users Charge. Mangangailangan po ito ng budget na 425 million pesos.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ang pinondohan po, dalawampu’t walong proyekto lang. Kinalimutan po ang dalawandaan at labing walong proyekto at pinalitan ng pitumpung proyekto na wala naman sa plano. Ang hininging 425 million pesos, naging 480 million pesos pa, lumaki lalo dahil sa mga proyektong sa piling-piling mga benepisyaryo lang napunta.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Mga proyekto po itong walang saysay, hindi pinag-aralan at hindi pinaghandaan, kaya parang kabuteng sumusulpot.<br />
Tapos na po ang panahon para dito. Sa administrasyon po natin, walang kota-kota, walang tongpats, ang pera ng taumbayan ay gagastusin para sa taumbayan lamang.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">NEGOTIATED CONTRACTS<br />
Meron pa po tayong natuklasan. Limang araw bago matapos ang termino ng nakaraang administrasyon, nagpautos silang maglabas ng 3.5 billion pesos para sa rehabilitasyon ng mga nasalanta nina Ondoy at Pepeng.<br />
Walumpu’t anim na proyekto ang paglalaanan dapat nito na hindi na sana idadaan sa public bidding. Labingsiyam sa mga ito na nagkakahalaga ng 981 million pesos ang muntik nang makalusot. Hindi pa nailalabas ang Special Allotment Release Order ay pirmado na ang mga kontrata.<br />
Buti na lang po ay natuklasan at pinigilan ito ni Secretary Rogelio Singson ng DPWH. Ngayon po ay dadaan na ang kabuuan ng 3.5 billion pesos sa tapat na bidding, at magagamit na ang pondo na ito sa pagbibigay ng lingap sa mga nawalan ng tahanan dahil kina Ondoy at Pepeng.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">NAPOCOR<br />
Pag-usapan naman natin ang nangyari sa NAPOCOR. Noong 2001 hanggang 2004, pinilit ng gobyerno ang NAPOCOR na magbenta ng kuryente nang palugi para hindi tumaas ang presyo. Tila ang dahilan: pinaghahandaan na nila ang eleksyon.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Dahil dito, noong 2004, sumagad ang pagkakabaon sa utang ng NAPOCOR. Napilitan ang pambansang gobyerno na sagutin ang dalawandaang bilyong pisong utang nito.<br />
Ang inakala ng taumbayan na natipid nila sa kuryente ay binabayaran din natin mula sa kaban ng bayan. May gastos na tayo sa kuryente, binabayaran pa natin ang dagdag na pagkakautang ng gobyerno.<br />
Kung naging matino ang pag-utang, sana’y nadagdagan ang ating kasiguruhan sa supply ng kuryente. Pero ang desisyon ay ibinatay sa maling pulitika, at hindi sa pangangailangan ng taumbayan. Ang taumbayan, matapos pinagsakripisyo ay lalo pang pinahirapan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">MRT<br />
Ganito rin po ang nangyari sa MRT. Sinubukan na namang bilhin ang ating pagmamahal. Pinilit ang operator na panatilihing mababa ang pamasahe.<br />
Hindi tuloy nagampanan ang garantiyang ibinigay sa operator na mababawi nila ang kanilang puhunan. Dahil dito, inutusan ang Landbank at Development Bank of the Philippines na bilhin ang MRT.<br />
Ang pera ng taumbayan, ipinagpalit sa isang naluluging operasyon.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">NFA<br />
Dumako naman po tayo sa pondo ng NFA.<br />
Noong 2004: 117,000 metric tons ang pagkukulang ng supply ng Pilipinas. Ang binili nila, 900,000 metric tons. Kahit ulitin mo pa ng mahigit pitong beses ang pagkukulang, sobra pa rin ang binili nila.<br />
Noong 2007: 589,000 metric tons ang pagkukulang ng supply sa Pilipinas. Ang binili nila, 1.827 million metric tons. Kahit ulitin mo pa ng mahigit tatlong beses ang pagkukulang, sobra na naman ang binili nila.<br />
Ang masakit nito, dahil sobra-sobra ang binibili nila taun-taon, nabubulok lang pala sa mga kamalig ang bigas, kagaya ng nangyari noong 2008.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Hindi po ba krimen ito, na hinahayaan nilang mabulok ang bigas, sa kabila ng apat na milyong Pilipinong hindi kumakain ng tatlong beses sa isang araw?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ang resulta nito, umabot na sa 171.6 billion pesos ang utang ng NFA noong Mayo ng taong ito.<br />
Ang tinapon na ito, halos puwede na sanang pondohan ang mga sumusunod:<br />
Ang budget ng buong Hudikatura, na 12.7 billion pesos sa taong ito.<br />
Ang Conditional Cash Transfers para sa susunod na taon, na nagkakahalaga ng 29.6 billion pesos.<br />
Ang lahat ng classroom na kailangan ng ating bansa, na nagkakahalaga ng 130 billion pesos.<br />
Kasuklam-suklam ang kalakarang ito. Pera na, naging bato pa.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">ZERO BUDGET<br />
Narinig po ninyo kung paano nilustay ang kaban ng bayan. Ang malinaw po sa ngayon: ang anumang pagbabago ay magmumula sa pagsiguro natin na magwawakas na ang pagiging maluho at pagwawaldas.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kaya nga po mula ngayon: ititigil na natin ang paglulustay sa salapi ng bayan. Tatanggalin natin ang mga proyektong mali.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ito po ang punto ng tinatawag nating zero-based approach sa ating budget. Ang naging kalakaran po, taun-taon ay inuulit lamang ang budget na puno ng tagas. Dadagdagan lang nang konti, puwede na.<br />
Sa susunod na buwan ay maghahain tayo ng budget na kumikilala nang tama sa mga problema, at magtutuon din ng pansin sa tamang solusyon.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">IMMEDIATE STEPS<br />
TAX EVASION<br />
Ilan lang ito sa mga natuklasan nating problema. Heto naman po ang ilang halimbawa ng mga hakbang na ginagawa natin.<br />
Nandiyan po ang kaso ng isang may-ari ng sanglaan. Bumili siya ng sasakyang tinatayang nasa dalawampu’t anim na milyong piso ang halaga.<br />
Kung kaya mong bumili ng Lamborghini, bakit hindi mo kayang magbayad ng buwis?<br />
Nasampahan na po ito ng kaso. Sa pangunguna nina Finance Secretary Cesar Purisima, Justice Secretary Leila de Lima, BIR Commissioner Kim Henares at Customs Commissioner Lito Alvarez, bawat linggo po ay may bago tayong kasong isinasampa kontra sa mga smuggler at sa mga hindi nagbabayad ng tamang buwis.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">EXTRALEGAL KILLINGS<br />
Natukoy na rin po ang salarin sa mga kaso nina Francisco Baldomero, Jose Daguio at Miguel Belen, tatlo sa anim na insidente ng extralegal killings mula nang umupo tayo.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Singkuwenta porsyento po ng mga insidente ng extralegal killings ang patungo na sa kanilang resolusyon.<br />
Ang natitira pong kalahati ay hindi natin tatantanan ang pag-usig hanggang makamit ang katarungan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">TRUTH COMMISSION<br />
Pananagutin natin ang mga mamamatay-tao. Pananagutin din natin ang mga corrupt sa gobyerno.<br />
Nagsimula nang mabuo ang ating Truth Commission, sa pangunguna ni dating Chief Justice Hilario Davide. Hahanapin natin ang katotohanan sa mga nangyari diumanong katiwalian noong nakaraang siyam na taon.<br />
Sa loob ng linggong ito, pipirmahan ko ang kauna-unahang Executive Order na nagtatalaga sa pagbuo nitong Truth Commission.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">PUBLIC-PRIVATE PARTNERSHIPS<br />
Kung ang sagot sa kawalan ng katarungan ay pananagutan, ang sagot naman sa kakulangan natin sa pondo ay mga makabago at malikhaing paraan para tugunan ang mga pagkatagal-tagal nang problema.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Napakarami po ng ating pangangailangan: mula sa edukasyon, imprastruktura, pangkalusugan, pangangailangan ng militar at kapulisan, at marami pang iba. Hindi kakasya ang pondo para mapunan ang lahat ng ito.<br />
Kahit gaano po kalaki ang kakulangan para mapunan ang mga listahan ng ating pangangailangan, ganado pa rin ako dahil marami nang nagpakita ng panibagong interes at kumpyansa sa Pilipinas.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ito ang magiging solusyon: mga Public-Private Partnerships. Kahit wala pa pong pirmahang nangyayari dito, masasabi kong maganda ang magiging bunga ng maraming usapin ukol dito.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">May mga nagpakita na po ng interes, gustong magtayo ng expressway na mula Maynila, tatahak ng Bulacan, Nueva Ecija, Nueva Vizcaya, hanggang sa dulo ng Cagayan Valley nang hindi gugugol ang estado kahit na po piso.<br />
Sa larangan ng ating Sandatahang Lakas:</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Mayroon po tayong 36,000 nautical miles ng baybayin. Ang mayroon lamang tayo: tatlumpu’t dalawang barko. Itong mga barkong ito, panahon pa ni MacArthur.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">May nagmungkahi sa atin, ito ang proposisyon: uupahan po nila ang headquarters ng Navy sa Roxas Boulevard at ang Naval Station sa Fort Bonifacio.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Sagot po nila ang paglipat ng Navy Headquarters sa Camp Aguinaldo. Agaran, bibigyan tayo ng isandaang milyong dolyar. At dagdag pa sa lahat nang iyan, magsusubi pa sila sa atin ng kita mula sa mga negosyong itatayo nila sa uupahan nilang lupa.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Sa madali pong sabi: Makukuha natin ang kailangan natin, hindi tatayo gagastos, kikita pa tayo.<br />
Marami na pong nag-alok at nagmungkahi sa atin, mula lokal hanggang dayuhang negosyante, na magpuno ng iba’t ibang pangangailangan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Mula sa mga public-private partnerships na ito, lalago ang ating ekonomiya, at bawat Pilipino makikinabang. Napakaraming sektor na matutulungan nito.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Maipapatayo na po ang imprastrukturang kailangan natin para palaguin ang turismo.<br />
Sa agrikultura, makapagtatayo na tayo ng mga grains terminals, refrigeration facilities, maayos na road networks at post-harvest facilities.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kung maisasaayos natin ang ating food supply chain sa tulong ng pribadong sektor, sa halip na mag-angkat tayo ay maari na sana tayong mangarap na mag-supply sa pandaigdigang merkado.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kung maitatayo ang minumungkahi sa ating railway system, bababa ang presyo ng bilihin. Mas mura, mas mabilis, mas maginhawa, at makakaiwas pa sa kotong cops at mga kumokotong na rebelde ang mga bumibiyahe.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">STREAMLINING PROCESSES<br />
Paalala lang po: una sa ating plataporma ang paglikha ng mga trabaho, at nanggagaling ang trabaho sa paglago ng industriya. Lalago lamang ang industriya kung gagawin nating mas malinis, mas mabilis, at mas maginhawa ang proseso para sa mga gustong magnegosyo.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Pabibilisin natin ang proseso ng mga proyektong sumasailalim sa Build-Operate-Transfer. Sa tulong ng lahat ng sangay ng gobyerno at ng mga mamamayan, pabababain natin sa anim na buwan ang proseso na noon ay inaabot ng taon kung hindi dekada.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">May mga hakbang na rin pong sinisimulan ang DTI, sa pamumuno ni Secretary Gregory Domingo:<br />
Ang walang-katapusang pabalik-balik sa proseso ng pagrehistro ng pangalan ng kumpanya, na kada dalaw ay umaabot ng apat hanggang walong oras, ibababa na natin sa labinlimang minuto.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ang dating listahan ng tatlumpu’t anim na dokumento, ibababa natin sa anim. Ang dating walong pahinang application form, ibababa natin sa isang pahina.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Nananawagan ako sa ating mga LGUs. Habang naghahanap tayo ng paraan para gawing mas mabilis ang pagbubukas ng mga negosyo, pag-aralan din sana nila ang kanilang mga proseso. Kailangan itong gawing mas mabilis, at kailangan itong itugma sa mga sinisumulan nating reporma.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Negosyante, sundalo, rebelde, at karaniwang Pilipino, lahat po makikinabang dito. Basta po hindi dehado ang Pilipino, papasukin po natin lahat iyan. Kailangan na po nating simulan ang pagtutulungan para makamit ito. Huwag nating pahirapan ang isa’t isa.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Parating na po ang panahon na hindi na natin kailangang mamili sa pagitan ng seguridad ng ating mamamayan o sa kinabukasan ng inyong mga anak.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">FREEING UP FUNDS<br />
EDUCATION<br />
Oras na maipatupad ang public-private partnerships na ito, mapopondohan ang mga serbisyong panlipunan, alinsunod sa ating plataporma.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Magkakapondo na po para maipatupad ang mga plano natin sa edukasyon.<br />
Mapapalawak natin ang basic education cycle mula sa napakaikling sampung taon tungo sa global standard na labindalawang taon.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Madadagdagan natin ang mga classroom. Mapopondohan natin ang service contracting sa ilalim ng GASTPE.<br />
Pati ang conditional cash transfers, na magbabawas ng pabigat sa bulsa ng mga pamilya, madadagdan na rin ng pondo.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">PHILHEALTH<br />
Maipapatupad ang plano natin sa PhilHealth.<br />
Una, tutukuyin natin ang tunay na bilang ng mga nangangailangan nito. Sa ngayon, hindi magkakatugma ang datos. Sabi ng PhilHealth sa isang bibig, walumpu’t pitong porsyento na raw ang merong coverage. Sa kabilang bibig naman, singkuwenta’y tres porsyento naman. Ayon naman sa National Statistics Office, tatlumpu’t walong porsyento ang may coverage.<br />
Ngayon pa lang, kumikilos na si Secretary Dinky Soliman at ang DSWD upang ipatupad ang National Household Targetting System, na magtutukoy sa mga pamilyang higit na nagangailangan ng tulong. Tinatayang siyam na bilyon ang kailangan para mabigyan ng PhilHealth ang limang milyong pinakamaralitang pamilyang Pilipino.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">LEGISLATIVE AGENDA<br />
Napakaganda po ng hinaharap natin. Kasama na po natin ang pribadong sektor, at kasama na rin natin ang League of Provinces, sa pangunguna nina Governor Alfonso Umali kasama sina Governor L-Ray Villafuerte at Governor Icot Petilla. Handa na pong makipagtulungan para makibahagi sa pagtustos ng mga gastusin. Alam ko rin pong hindi magpapahuli ang League of Cities sa pangunguna ni Mayor Oscar Rodriguez.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kung ang mga gobyernong lokal ay nakikiramay na sa ating mga adhikain, ang Kongreso namang pinanggalingan ko, siguro naman maasahan ko din.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Nagpakitang-gilas na po ang gabinete sa pagtukoy ng ating mga problema at sa paglulunsad ng mga solusyon sa loob lamang ng tatlong linggo.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Nang bagyo pong Basyang, ang sabi sa atin ng mga may prangkisa sa kuryente, apat na araw na walang kuryente. Dahil sa mabilis na pagkilos ni Secretary Rene Almendras at ng Department of Energy, naibalik ang kuryente sa halos lahat sa loob lamang ng beinte-kwatro oras.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ito pong sinasabing kakulangan sa tubig sa Metro Manila, kinilusan agad ni Secretary Rogelio Singson at ng DPWH. Hindi na siya naghintay ng utos, kaya nabawasan ang perwisyo.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Nakita na rin natin ang gilas ng mga hinirang nating makatulong sa Gabinete. Makatuwiran naman po sigurong umasa na hindi na sila padadaanin sa butas ng karayom para makumpirma ng Commission on Appointments. Kung mangyayari po ito, marami pa sa mga mahuhusay na Pilipino ang maeengganyong magsilbi sa gobyerno.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Sa lalong madaling panahon po, uupo na tayo sa LEDAC at pag-uusapan ang mga mahahalagang batas na kailangan nating ipasa. Makakaasa kayo na mananatiling bukas ang aking isipan, at ang ating ugnayan ay mananatiling tapat.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Isinusulong po natin ang Fiscal Responsibility Bill, kung saan hindi tayo magpapasa ng batas na mangangailangan ng pondo kung hindi pa natukoy ang panggagalingan nito. May 104.1 billion pesos tayong kailangan para pondohan ang mga batas na naipasa na, ngunit hindi maipatupad.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kailangan din nating isaayos ang mga insentibong piskal na ibinigay noong nakaraan. Ngayong naghihigpit tayo ng sinturon, kailangang balikan kung alin sa mga ito ang dapat manatili at kung ano ang dapat nang itigil.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Huwag po tayong pumayag na magkaroon ng isa pang NBN-ZTE. Sa lokal man o dayuhan manggagaling ang pondo, dapat dumaan ito sa tamang proseso. Hinihingi ko po ang tulong ninyo upang amiyendahan ang ating Procurement Law.<br />
Ayon po sa Saligang Batas, tungkulin ng estado ang siguruhing walang lamangan sa merkado. Bawal ang monopolya, bawal ang mga cartel na sasakal sa kumpetisyon. Kailangan po natin ng isang Anti-Trust Law na magbibigay-buhay sa mga prinsipyong ito. Ito ang magbibigay ng pagkakataon sa mga Small- at Medium-scale Enterprises na makilahok at tumulong sa paglago ng ating ekonomiya.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ipasa na po natin ang National Land Use Bill.<br />
Una rin pong naging batas ng Commonwealth ang National Defense Act, na ipinasa noon pang 1935. Kailangan nang palitan ito ng batas na tutugon sa pangangailangan ng pambansang seguridad sa kasalukuyan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Nakikiusap po akong isulong ang Whistleblower’s Bill upang patuloy nang iwaksi ang kultura ng takot at pananahimik.<br />
Palalakasin pa lalo ang Witness Protection Program. Alalahanin po natin na noong taong 2009 hanggang 2010, may nahatulan sa 95% ng mga kaso kung saan may witness na sumailalim sa programang ito.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kailangang repasuhin ang ating mga batas. Nanawagan po akong umpisahan na ang rekodipikasyon ng ating mga batas, upang siguruhing magkakatugma sila at hindi salu-salungat.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">PEACE PROCESS<br />
Ito pong mga batas na ito ang batayan ng kaayusan, ngunit ang pundasyon ng lahat ng ginagawa natin ay ang prinsipyong wala tayong mararating kung walang kapayapaan at katahimikan.<br />
Dalawa ang hinaharap nating suliranin sa usapin ng kapayapaan: ang situwasyon sa Mindanao, at ang patuloy na pag-aaklas ng CPP-NPA-NDF.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Tungkol sa situwasyon sa Mindanao: Hindi po nagbabago ang ating pananaw. Mararating lamang ang kapayapaan at katahimikan kung mag-uusap ang lahat ng apektado: Moro, Lumad, at Kristiyano. Inatasan na natin si Dean Marvic Leonen na mangasiwa sa ginagawa nating pakikipag-usap sa MILF.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Iiwasan natin ang mga pagkakamaling nangyari sa nakaraang administrasyon, kung saan binulaga na lang ang mga mamamayan ng Mindanao. Hindi tayo puwedeng magbulag-bulagan sa mga dudang may kulay ng pulitika ang proseso, at hindi ang kapakanan ng taumbayan ang tanging interes.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kinikilala natin ang mga hakbang na ginagawa ng MILF sa pamamagitan ng pagdidisplina sa kanilang hanay. Inaasahan natin na muling magsisimula ang negosasyon pagkatapos ng Ramadan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Tungkol naman po sa CPP-NPA-NDF: handa na ba kayong maglaan ng kongkretong mungkahi, sa halip na pawang batikos lamang?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kung kapayapaan din ang hangad ninyo, handa po kami sa malawakang tigil-putukan. Mag-usap tayo.<br />
Mahirap magsimula ang usapan habang mayroon pang amoy ng pulbura sa hangin. Nananawagan ako: huwag po natin hayaang masayang ang napakagandang pagkakataong ito upang magtipon sa ilalim ng iisang adhikain.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Kapayapaan at katahimikan po ang pundasyon ng kaunlaran. Habang nagpapatuloy ang barilan, patuloy din ang pagkakagapos natin sa kahirapan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">PANAWAGAN<br />
Dapat din po nating mabatid: ito ay panahon ng sakripisyo. At ang sakripisyong ito ay magiging puhunan para sa ating kinabukasan. Kaakibat ng ating mga karapatan at kalayaan ay ang tungkulin natin sa kapwa at sa bayan.<br />
Inaasahan ko po ang ating mga kaibigan sa media, lalo na sa radyo at sa print, sa mga nagbablock-time, at sa community newspapers, kayo na po mismo ang magbantay sa inyong hanay.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Mabigyang-buhay sana ang mga batayang prinsipyo ng inyong bokasyon: ang magbigay-linaw sa mahahalagang isyu; ang maging patas at makatotohanan, at ang itaas ang antas ng pampublikong diskurso.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Tungkulin po ng bawat Pilipino na tutukan ang mga pinunong tayo rin naman ang nagluklok sa puwesto. Humakbang mula sa pakikialam tungo sa pakikilahok. Dahil ang nakikialam, walang-hanggan ang reklamo. Ang nakikilahok, nakikibahagi sa solusyon.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Napakatagal na pong namamayani ang pananaw na ang susi sa asenso ay ang intindihin ang sarili kaysa intindihin ang kapwa. Malinaw po sa akin: paano tayo aasenso habang nilalamangan ang kapwa?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ang hindi nabigyan ng pagkakataong mag-aral, paanong makakakuha ng trabaho? Kung walang trabaho, paanong magiging konsumer? Paanong mag-iimpok sa bangko?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ngunit kung babaliktarin natin ang pananaw-kung iisipin nating “Dadagdagan ko ang kakayahan ng aking kapwa”-magbubunga po ito, at ang lahat ay magkakaroon ng pagkakataon.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Maganda na po ang nasimulan natin. At mas lalong maganda po ang mararating natin. Ngunit huwag nating kalimutan na mayroong mga nagnanasang hindi tayo magtagumpay. Dahil kapag hindi tayo nagtagumpay, makakabalik na naman sila sa kapangyarihan, at sa pagsasamantala sa taumbayan.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Akin pong paniwala na Diyos at taumbayan ang nagdala sa ating kinalalagyan ngayon. Habang nakatutok tayo sa kapakanan ng ating kapwa, bendisyon at patnubay ay tiyak na maaasahan natin sa Poong Maykapal. At kapag nanalig tayo na ang kasangga natin ay ang Diyos, mayroon ba tayong hindi kakayanin?</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Ang mandato nating nakuha sa huling eleksyon ay patunay na umaasa pa rin ang Pilipino sa pagbabago. Iba na talaga ang situwasyon. Puwede na muling mangarap. Tayo nang tumungo sa katuparan ng ating mga pinangarap.<br />
Maraming salamat po.</p>


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		<title>How To Get Parents Involved With School Activities</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/how-to-get-parents-involved-with-school-activities/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/how-to-get-parents-involved-with-school-activities/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 26 Jul 2010 02:56:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bridge the gap]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[educational jargon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[information schools]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lack of parental involvement]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[s education]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/how-to-get-parents-involved-with-school-activities/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Research has repeatedly shown that children succeed academically, socially and emotionally and become more well-rounded and balanced individuals if their parents are involved in their education and school activities. Getting involved also sends the message to children that parents are genuinely interested in their education, and that going to school ...]]></description>
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<p>Research has repeatedly shown that children succeed academically, socially and emotionally and become more well-rounded and balanced individuals if their parents are involved in their education and school activities. Getting involved also sends the message to children that parents are genuinely interested in their education, and that going to school is a positive, valuable cause.</p>
<p>But many parents don&#8217;t seem to show much interest in this cause when they aren&#8217;t participators in their children&#8217;s school activities. They often say they don&#8217;t have the time or energy or that they feel uncomfortable in their children&#8217;s schools. Other parents just seem to be confused about their options and how they can participate, or are just lacking the right information.</p>
<p>So how can schools get parents involved with school activities?</p>
<p>Communication is the key. A major reason for lack of parental involvement is lack of clear, straightforward and helpful information. Schools and teachers need to make contact with parents—in person, on the phone, through e-mail and websites, through letters and notes sent home, through newsletters. Teachers need to talk to parents in a basic manner without adding &#8220;educational jargon&#8221; and ensure parents have regular access to readable information about their children&#8217;s school activities—both in and out of the classroom.</p>
<p>Parents want to know what their children are learning, what school activities they are involved in, how they as parents can specifically be involved with their children&#8217;s education and school activities, how they can approach teachers and how they can help their children at home.</p>
<p>Providing this information regularly, consistently and in various formats will help bridge the gap between schools lacking parental involvement and parents not being involved in the schools.</p>
<p>Accommodation and inclusion is another strategy for getting parents involved in school activities. Parents need to know that schools are sensitive to their needs, lifestyles and demands. Teachers should try and work around parents&#8217; work schedules for school activities, meetings and conferences, and also work around cultural or language barriers. Schools should make it easy, too, by letting parents know that involvement doesn&#8217;t have to be an all-consuming, complicated process.</p>
<p>Another way to be accommodating is to invite parents to act as partners in the school decision-making process. They should regularly ask for parents&#8217; concerns and suggestions, and then deal with them accordingly. If schools want parents to come to school meetings, they could first of all provide a survey asking what dates and times are the most suitable, provide child care for younger siblings, and a &#8220;parental platform&#8221; during the meeting where parents are given the opportunity to speak, make suggestions and ask questions.</p>
<p>Be resourceful. Finally, schools should provide resources for parents who want to learn more and become more involved in their children&#8217;s school activities and education. Offer parent education classes. Create a parenting resource center at the school with informational material such as brochures, articles, magazines, tips, textbooks, videos and CDs or tapes. Develop a school website with a section for parents. Set up sessions or workshops at the school on issues like single parenting, helping with homework, improving grades and study skills, child care, raising teenagers, drug and sexual awareness, etc. Send &#8220;goodie bags&#8221; home filled with activities parents can do with their children.</p>
<p>The opportunities are endless, and if schools and teachers are truly committed to the cause of parental involvement in education and school activities, then they can get parents on board as well.</p>
<p>          <span>Getting parents involved in their child&#8217;s education can be a daunting task. Websites like <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://GetParentsInvolved.org">GetParentsInvolved.org</a> help teach how parents can get more involved with their local school. <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/education-articles/how-to-get-parents-involved-with-school-activities-14455.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


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		<title>Parenting Management</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/parenting-management/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sun, 25 Jul 2010 10:59:28 +0000</pubDate>
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				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[economic boom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[economic depression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[law introduction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[local school system]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[world war ii]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[
&#8220;Most children are raised by amateurs, not professionals.&#8221;
- Bryce&#8217;s Law
INTRODUCTION
Want to know what to expect of the work force in the years ahead?  Look no farther
than our schools or homes.  Let me preface my remarks by saying that in addition
to all of my other responsibilities, I was very ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p>&#8220;Most children are raised by amateurs, not professionals.&#8221;<br />
- Bryce&#8217;s Law</p>
<p>INTRODUCTION</p>
<p>Want to know what to expect of the work force in the years ahead?  Look no farther<br />
than our schools or homes.  Let me preface my remarks by saying that in addition<br />
to all of my other responsibilities, I was very active in my local Little League for a<br />
number of years where I served as coach, umpire, and on the local board of <br />
directors.  Further, I have been very active locally in offering Masonic scholarships to <br />
High School students.  In addition, my wife has been active in the local school system <br />
for the last ten years at the elementary, middle, and high school levels (this also <br />
included PTA and SAC).  Although we probably won&#8217;t win an award as the world&#8217;s <br />
best parents, we made a point of becoming an important and influential part of our <br />
children&#8217;s lives.  We didn&#8217;t take any special courses in parenting, we just got <br />
involved.  But we are the exceptions as opposed to the rule.</p>
<p>Prior to World War II, the country was immersed in an economic depression which<br />
put a strain on families and disrupted our society.  Everyone in a family was expected<br />
to pitch in and do their part in order to survive, this included going to school and their<br />
place of worship.  Some families suffered severe hardships during this period causing<br />
children to drop out of school and go to work.  They didn&#8217;t drop out as some form<br />
of rebellion or protest, but to simply earn money to help support the family.  Consequently,<br />
many earned nothing higher than a Junior High diploma which was prized by many<br />
families.  The point is, there was a sense of family back then and the people&#8217;s hunger<br />
built character.  They understood the value of a dollar, worked hard and squandered <br />
nothing.  It was this generation that got us through the war and propelled the country <br />
towards economic success in the latter part of the 20th century.</p>
<p>In the 1950&#8217;s and 1960&#8217;s, as the country was experiencing an economic boom, a parent<br />
normally stayed at home to manage the family, usually the wife.  If a child<br />
had a problem, a parent was always home to tend to their needs.  Children no longer <br />
had to drop out of school to support the family and our High Schools and Colleges <br />
swelled with students.  The &#8220;baby boomers&#8221; were considered well adjusted<br />
and readily adapted to the work force.  This generation saw us through the space<br />
race and the technology revolution which changed the face of corporate America.</p>
<p>But in the last three decades, we began to lose faith in our economy and our<br />
standard of living.  As a result, both parents began to work inordinate hours and a<br />
generation gap began to emerge.  Exhausted by their work, the parents <br />
would return home where the last thing they wanted to hear was their child&#8217;s <br />
problems.  Consequently, children became social outcasts in their own homes and<br />
often had to fend for themselves; they simply  couldn&#8217;t relate with their parents.   Sure,<br />
the parents would sign their kids up for Summer Camp, Little League and Soccer, but <br />
this was viewed more as baby-sitting services as opposed to taking a true interest in <br />
the child&#8217;s development.  They would also give their kids television sets and video games<br />
to occupy their time.</p>
<p>Today, school teachers have become surrogate parents by default, something <br />
they weren&#8217;t trained for, nor inclined to accept.  Talk to a teacher and you will hear<br />
stories of lack of respect for authority, poor manners, and dysfunctional social<br />
intercourse.  Children today no longer learn their values from their parents<br />
but rather from Hollywood.  As young adults entering the work force, their work <br />
ethic, values, and behavior are noticeably different than the prior generation.  There <br />
is no longer a sense of quality, service, or craftsmanship; just put in your time and <br />
collect a paycheck.  This is all having an adverse effect on how we conduct <br />
business and the corporate culture.</p>
<p>Now, let me give you a the scary figure:  probably 20%, or less, of today&#8217;s<br />
graduating High School seniors are socially well adjusted.</p>
<p>Knowing this, what should you do as a manager?</p>
<p>THE NEED FOR PARENTING</p>
<p>In the past, if you were a new employee, it was assumed you knew how to manage<br />
your personal life and you were expected to adapt to the corporate culture.  This<br />
is no longer true and presents a problem for managers.  Younger employees today <br />
have problems managing money, dressing appropriately, and interpersonal relations <br />
and communications, not to mention alcohol, drugs, and sex.  They are raw and rough.  But <br />
are they salvageable?  They better be, for your company&#8217;s sake, as they represent <br />
tomorrow&#8217;s work force.</p>
<p>Perhaps we can take a lesson from the military services here.  The military is<br />
well aware they are not getting the &#8220;cream of the crop&#8221; when they take on new<br />
recruits.  Many are social misfits coming from broken homes.  As such, the<br />
military&#8217;s initial role is to break the individual of bad habits and impose a new <br />
system of discipline and work ethic.  Individualism is replaced by teamwork and, <br />
in the process, a sense of belonging and family is imposed.  This is either readily <br />
accepted by the new recruit or they are drummed out of the service.  Discipline, <br />
organization, teamwork, and a strong work ethic can have a dramatic affect on a<br />
drifting soul.  By doing so, it can bring order to lives and a sense of purpose, <br />
something that perhaps was neglected at home.  </p>
<p>Today&#8217;s Drill Instructors and junior officers also find themselves as surrogate parents <br />
and are now instructed in counseling young soldiers.  The boot camps of today are<br />
a lot different than what the country experienced during World War II, Korea, and <br />
Viet Nam.  Yet, we are producing a fine class of soldiers which makes our country <br />
proud.  In other words, they must be doing something right.</p>
<p>If we have learned anything from the military in this regard, it is that the<br />
times have changed and our employees today have different needs requiring<br />
a new type of manager who can adequately tend to them.  And like today&#8217;s<br />
Drill Instructors and school teachers, managers are finding themselves in the<br />
role of surrogate parents, like it or not.  Managers bristle at this notion.  After all, <br />
they want to get on with their business and do not want to be regarded as a <br />
baby-sitter.  But the fact remains, home parenting skills are at an all-time low <br />
and to overcome this problem, someone has to assume the duty to compensate <br />
for this inadequacy.  Again, the military readily understands this and has adapted<br />
accordingly.  But can business?</p>
<p>Understand this, corporate America&#8217;s &#8220;recruits&#8221; come predominantly from the<br />
colleges and universities whose purpose is not to teach social skills, but rather,<br />
to teach people how to learn.  A college diploma most definitely does not<br />
mean the graduate is socially well-adjusted, but that he/she has learned to study <br />
and accept new ideas.  If anything, the student&#8217;s extracurricular activities tell <br />
more about a person&#8217;s personality than the degree itself.  For example, participation <br />
in team sports, club activities, or Greek life speaks volumes about a person&#8217;s<br />
personality and social skills.</p>
<p>PAST EFFORTS</p>
<p>In the past, new corporate recruits underwent special training programs to learn how<br />
the company conducts business.  Sales people in particular had to undergo rigorous <br />
training to learn how to present products and care for the customers.  Workmen <br />
underwent training to learn how to build quality products.  However, such programs <br />
have been slashed in recent times as a means for cutting costs (and will be the subject<br />
of a future paper).</p>
<p>There was also a period where mentors were assigned to new employees to chaperone<br />
them on their journey through the corporate world.  Mentors were basically a<br />
&#8220;Big Brother/Sister&#8221; program where senior employees would offer sage advice<br />
to neophytes on adapting to the corporate world.  But like the training programs, <br />
mentoring is also being phased out.</p>
<p>Although mentoring and training programs were intended to develop the employee&#8217;s<br />
skills and effectiveness from a corporate perspective, neither dwelled on the personal<br />
problems of the employee.</p>
<p>Now that new employees are left to fend for themselves, a generation gap is emerging<br />
in business.  Managers from just about every job segment are frustrated with new<br />
employees, and, likewise, new employees are frustrated with management.  Whereas<br />
managers lament how little is accomplished by new employees, new employees<br />
complain how much time they are putting in at work.  This highlights a significant<br />
difference between the generations:  whereas the new employees are watching the<br />
clock, the managers are watching what is produced.  The two are not synonymous,<br />
but nobody has taught the young employees this yet.  To the &#8220;newbies,&#8221; their time is <br />
what is important, regardless if they produce anything worthwhile or not; to the manager, <br />
it is just the opposite.  Also, young people believe calling in sick is an acceptable form of <br />
behavior.  Where did they learn all this?  On their own.  It is a sad state of affairs when <br />
the media has more influence over the values of our children than parents do.  But<br />
when adults abdicate parenting to the media, it is not entirely surprising.</p>
<p>So, what is needed?  More training?  Mentoring?  Nope.  Just some parenting.  The sooner<br />
corporations realize this, the sooner they can begin to develop mature and responsible <br />
employees.  Again, this is why the military now teaches its Drill Instructors basic<br />
counseling techniques, so they can help new recruits find their way through life and become <br />
a good soldier.  It is most definitely not &#8220;baby-sitting&#8221; but, rather, a recognition that parents<br />
have dropped the ball in their child&#8217;s development and someone has to pick up the<br />
pieces in order for the newbie to realize their potential.</p>
<p>I do not claim to have a Ph.D. in parenting, but as I see it there are three primary<br />
duties a parent needs to inculcate:</p>
<p>Role Model &#8211; first, a parent has to be a good role model with attributes their subordinates<br />
want to aspire to attain.  Role models are respected for their authority and become<br />
a highly credible source of information and inspiration,</p>
<p>Teacher &#8211; second, a parent has to be able to teach, not just academic lessons but<br />
those of life; e.g., morality, socialization, even finances (e.g., balancing a<br />
checkbook, life insurance, etc.).  It is the teacher who establishes the rules and <br />
regulations of the classroom and, as such, is also the disciplinarian.</p>
<p>Guidance Counselor &#8211; third, parenting includes guiding others on their path through<br />
life, explaining options and making recommendations.</p>
<p>Very important, a parent has to recognize they won&#8217;t have all of the answers, but<br />
should know how to point someone in the right direction to get the answers they need.</p>
<p>Above all else, a parent has to care about the welfare of their offspring.  I am not <br />
suggesting corporate parents love their children like biological parents, but they<br />
need to invest time in the person, believe in the person, and motivate them<br />
accordingly, whether through kindness or a good swift kick in the rear.  The<br />
corporate parent has to also know when their work is complete and allow the<br />
offspring to move on to the next stage of their corporate life.</p>
<p>The military has the advantage of written contracts and boot camps to<br />
indoctrinate new recruits.  Perhaps a corporate boot camp could be devised<br />
and teach the same lessons as found in the military, such as:</p>
<p>Cause and effect, e.g., if you make a mistake, you know you will be penalized accordingly.</p>
<p>The value of good workmanship and its impact on others.</p>
<p>How to give and take an order.</p>
<p>Discipline and code of conduct.</p>
<p>Teamwork.</p>
<p>CONCLUSION</p>
<p>Companies today are  at a loss coping with the newest generation of<br />
workers.  What they don&#8217;t realize is, it will get worse before it gets better.  Since<br />
most biological parents are content with allowing others to teach their children<br />
the necessary values in life, teachers, the military and corporations are forced to <br />
pick up the slack, like it or not.  The sooner we admit this, the sooner we can address <br />
how to remedy the situation.  Whether this involves one-on-one counseling or a <br />
boot camp type of environment, something has to be done to teach our newest wave <br />
of workers the proper values to succeed in business and in life.</p>
<p>Let me leave you with a real-life story on parenting in the workplace.  Some time <br />
ago I was visiting with a CIO in Columbus, Ohio who took me on a tour of<br />
his facility.  Along the way, we happened upon a young programmer who <br />
was new to the company.  Frankly, he looked a little wet behind the ears and <br />
had long hair over his collar.  After the CIO introduced me to the young man, he <br />
instructed him to go get a haircut.  The young programmer, shot back<br />
indignantly, &#8220;You can&#8217;t say that to me!&#8221;</p>
<p>The CIO turned calmly but deliberately to the programmer, and said, <br />
&#8220;Yes I can.  Watch,&#8221; then pointing to his mouth, &#8220;Get a haircut.  Now!&#8221;  </p>
<p>The programmer backed down and, to his credit, dutifully got a haircut.  </p>
<p>I had just witnessed a little &#8220;Parenting Management&#8221; in action.  The CIO<br />
exercised his authority and had quickly instructed the newbie on one<br />
of the rules to be observed in the workplace.  The programmer&#8217;s biological<br />
parents hadn&#8217;t instructed him properly, now it defaulted to his corporate<br />
parent.</p>
<p>&#8220;Parenting Management&#8221; &#8211; Just remember, you heard it here first.</p>
<p>          <span>Tim Bryce is the Managing Director of M. Bryce &amp; Associates (MBA)<br />
of Palm Harbor, Florida and has 30 years of experience in the field.<br />
He is available for training and consulting on an international basis.<br />
He can be contacted at:  timb001@phmainstreet.comCopyright © 2006 MBA.  All rights reserved. <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/corporate-articles/parenting-management-32326.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


Tags:  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/economic-depression/' >economic depression</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/world-war-ii/' >world war ii</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/law-introduction/' >law introduction</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/local-school-system/' >local school system</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/economic-boom/' >economic boom</A>  <BR/>

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		<title>What Good Parenting Entails</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/what-good-parenting-entails/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/what-good-parenting-entails/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 24 Jul 2010 14:00:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Family & Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[consistent discipline]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional blackmail]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mistaken belief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[natural heart]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[patient guidance]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[
&#8220;There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One is roots; the other, wings.”  &#8211; Hodding Carter
All parents want their children to develop into well adjusted adults, respected as much for the integrity of their character as for their professional skills. This doesn&#8217;t just ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[
<p>&#8220;There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One is roots; the other, wings.”  &#8211; Hodding Carter</p>
<p>All parents want their children to develop into well adjusted adults, respected as much for the integrity of their character as for their professional skills. This doesn&#8217;t just happen overnight. It takes years of patient guidance, consistent discipline and above all, an abundance of love that is tangible to the child even during the worst periods in their growing up &#8211; and believe me, there will be many of those, before you can sit back and say with relief, &#8220;My work is done&#8221;.</p>
<p>Many people equate an abundance of love with spoiling their child. I think that perhaps they have not understood what the term LOVE means, especially as it relates to a child. Let us start with what it is not:</p>
<p>1) Love is <b>not</b> over-indulging your child, giving in to every whim of his/hers because you feel guilty, tired, afraid you would lose your temper or scared that your kid may not love you. </p>
<p>2) Love is <b>not</b> harshly disciplining your children for every little broken rule in the mistaken belief  that you are doing it for their good and if you don&#8217;t punish them often and hard, a life of turmoil and misery beckons.</p>
<p>3) Love is <b>not</b> protecting your kids from the natural heart aches that come with growing up &#8211; whether it is a friend&#8217;s betrayal, loss of a pet or loved one, not getting something deeply longed for. </p>
<p>4) Love is <b>not</b> using emotional blackmail at any time or for any reason in order to control them and get them to do what you want them to do.</p>
<p>Love that is most beneficial to children is one that focuses on them and accepts them for the unique individuals that they are. To be a truly loving parent, we need to learn to be a bit dispassionate about our kids. Even the most well meaning of parents tend to forget this. Unbiased love for your children helps you to focus on the child, rather than the fact that he/she belongs to you. You then learn to accept the possibilities and limitations of each of your children and to marvel at their individual potential. If there are no pre-conceived expectations, there is less pressure on the child and there are no feelings of disappointment in the parent. When children sense that they are not being measured against their siblings or friends, their confidence grows, there are less disciplinary issues and above all, they feel valued for themselves. Learning to love our kids this way is one of the hardest lessons in parenting; it being so natural to think in terms of &#8220;My Children&#8221; with the emphasis on &#8220;My&#8221; rather than on &#8220;Children&#8221;. </p>
<p>Good parenting is a skill honed through trial and error. Most parents are so concerned about being good parents that they tend to over compensate for their perceived inadequacies. They tend to overlook the fact that most kids prefer laughter, a home filled with warmth and understanding and parents whom they can trust and turn to in times of trouble rather than being inundated with designer clothes, shoes and toys. How often do we hear the complaint that kids now-a-days are too obsessed with material things. Perhaps it is time we, as parents, ask ourselves how much we have contributed to our children&#8217;s obsessions. A lot of people seem to have lost faith in their ability to be good parents, mistakenly thinking that they should always be infallible. What we must never lose sight of is that for the most part, we do get it right and that our love for our children will guide our parental instincts. Problems arise only when we do not learn from our mistakes. Children seem to have an infinite capacity to forgive their parents if they know or feel that their mothers and/or fathers are trying to do their very best for them.</p>
<p>Parents are only human &#8211; a fact that is often ignored by our kids and even more so, by ourselves. It is alright to get angry or depressed, irritated or to just want some time to yourself. What is not alright is to let these feelings affect your behaviour towards your children. How you handle your emotions is a good indicator of how your kids will manage theirs when they grow up. Rather than pretend that everything is fine, it would be better if you explained to your kids that you are upset about something and that you need sometime to work through the problem. Not only will the children be relieved that they are not the reason for your turmoil, they will probably try hard not to upset you further. Explaining the rationale for your actions to your children in terms they can understand teaches them empathy, alleviates their concerns that they are the cause of your distress and shows them how negative emotions should be handled.</p>
<p>Most parents have a hard time trying to decide whether or not they should shield their young children from the harsh facts of life. War, famine, death &#8211; these are constantly in the news. Closer to home it might be the prolonged illness or death of a close relative, friend, or even a pet, the break up of a close friendship, divorce, losing a job or home. There is no guarantee that life will always be smooth sailing and the sooner children are taught to face such situations with equanimity, the more resilient they will be when, as adults, they have their own misfortunes to face. </p>
<p>Parenting can be stressful, it is often under valued and unglamorous yet it can be and very often is uplifting and provides some of our most precious memories. If we remember to relax and enjoy our kids, love them for who they are, try to inculcate a strong personal value system from a very early age, revel in their accomplishments and be a constant source of support for them, we can be sure of doing a pretty good job. There is, of course, the added bonus of our own self improvement as we try to be more like the person we want our children to emulate. </p>
<p></p>
<p>          <span>You too can successfully mould your child into achieving his/her full potential. Find out how, with this <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.ebookmall4U.co.uk/childgenius_list.htm">FREE eBook</a>.<br />
 For e-books and articles ranging from parenting to web designing, visit <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.ebookmall4U.co.uk">www.ebookmall4U.co.uk</a>.  <br class="clear" /><a rel="dofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/advice-articles/what-good-parenting-entails-88733.html">Article Source</a></span></p>


Tags:  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/mistaken-belief/' >mistaken belief</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/natural-heart/' >natural heart</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/emotional-blackmail/' >emotional blackmail</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/consistent-discipline/' >consistent discipline</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/patient-guidance/' >patient guidance</A>  <BR/>

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		<title>Bonding weekend</title>
		<link>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/bonding-weekend/</link>
		<comments>http://bestpinaymom.com/2010/07/bonding-weekend/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 24 Jul 2010 07:38:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>pinaymom</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Personal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[baby]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[baby halloween costumes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[going home]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Halloween]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weekday]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[I was really busy doing my post on baby halloween costumes when i realized that it’s already 3 pm. I almost forgot that I will go home early today. Because it’s Saturday we can leave our office earlier though it’s very seldom we can do it because there’s always tons ...]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: justify;">I was really busy doing my post on<a href="http://www.buycostumes.com/browse/Infant-Costumes/Kids-Costumes/_/N-1z1411bZ3l/results1.aspx"> baby halloween costumes</a> when i realized that it’s already 3 pm. I almost forgot that I will go home early today. Because it’s Saturday we can leave our office earlier though it’s very seldom we can do it because there’s always tons of work that prevents us from going home early. Anyway, I better wrap up and pack my things now or else today will turn out  like an ordinary weekday for me.</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">I want my family to enjoy our weekend so it’s time for our bonding activities together. So this is it for now. Have a great weekend!</p>


Tags:  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/halloween/' >Halloween</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/weekday/' >weekday</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/going-home/' >going home</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/baby-halloween-costumes/' >baby halloween costumes</A>,  <A href='http://bestpinaymom.com/tag/baby/' >baby</A>  <BR/>

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